WIGA Sexual Purity – Article
By Karen Linklater, Angie Roberson and Wendy Ungaro
You may recall that Alan gave a lesson on the book of Hosea last spring. We love this book because it is such a great account of God’s relentless, redeeming and unconditional love for His children. It is also a picture of how God is dishonored and hurt by the sinful actions of His children. Since Hosea uses Gomer’s sexual sin as an example of how God can restore us to himself regardless of our sin, WIGA is going to look at premarital sex and its consequences.
Our society views premarital sex as acceptable. In fact, we’re told that if you’re having “SAFE SEX”, that’s definitely OK because you’ll avoid pregnancy and STDs. These are merely physical consequences. What many teens don’t think about are the emotional and spiritual consequences of premarital sex. According to the Bible, there is no “SAFE SEX” outside of marriage. God is NOT trying to ruin your life by saying that premarital sex is a sin. Everything God created is “good”, and that includes sex. It’s just that
God created boundaries for this special, intimate act between man and woman. Sex within marriage is fulfilling, bonding and without guilt.
When you’re dating someone, you have no way of knowing if the relationship will last. And even though your feelings can be very intense and real, it’s likely that a relationship you have in high school will end. Sex is too important, too intimate and too wonderful to share with someone who isn’t committed to you for the rest of your life.
First, and always first, we must look at what scripture says:
"Therefore I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God - this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not confirm any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is, his good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:1-2
Here we're told that, as an act of worship, we need to offer our bodies to the Lord. PLEASE do not read this legalistically!!! What Paul wants us to understand here is that when we say YES to the Lord and claim that the gospel is true, there will be a transformation in us from the inside out!! So it's not about keeping rules and regulations - a sexual do and don't list - but that if we are truly changed on the inside - it will be our desire (not duty) to do what is pleasing to God. And the Lord says to offer our bodies as living sacrifices.
1 Corinthians 6:16-20 (The Message) also gives a lengthy argument against sex outside of marriage. The last verse states: “There's more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, "The two become one." Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever—the kind of sex that can never "become one." There is a sense in which sexual sins are different from all others. In sexual sin we violate the sacredness of our own bodies, these bodies that were made for God-given and God-modeled love, for "becoming one" with another. Or didn't you realize that your body is a sacred place, the place of the Holy Spirit? Don't you see that you can't live however you please, squandering what God paid such a high price for? The physical part of you is not some piece of property belonging to the spiritual part of you. God owns the whole works. So let people see God in and through your body.”
As you just read in the above scripture, God intended for there to be a spiritual dimension to sex between a man and a woman. Like no other creature that God made, human beings are spiritual. Sex creates a spiritual unity between the two people involved. Otherwise, sex would just be a physical act and there would be no difference between humans who desire fulfillment and animals that simply procreate. To be spiritually “naked” with each other means holding nothing back. When you go to bed together, it’s different from any other encounter. You truly go “all the way.” Sex creates spiritual, emotional and physical unity so powerful and important that it is reserved for married people—for those whom God has brought together to pledge their lives to each other. Marriage is the only relationship where you can safely unleash the power of such vulnerability and not feel guilty, used or “dirty”.
OK, premarital sex is a sin. So is jealousy in your heart, so is lying, so is murder, so is homosexual sex, etc. They all grieve the Lord. He forgives them all equally. All sin is equal, but the consequences are not. So, what do you do if you have engaged in premarital sex? First, know that you are forgiven and that God loves you so much. He also understands that you have confusion and weakness. But your sin does grieve Him, and He desires to have your relationship with Him restored.
To restore your relationship with God, you must understand, that it is one thing to recognize when you have done something that has violated God’s laws; it’s another to be saddened by it to such a degree that you are determined to never do it again. That’s repentance. Repentance means to change your mind, turn and walk the other way, and to be so deeply sorry for what you have done that you will do whatever it takes to keep it from happening again. Confession means we recognize we have done wrong and admit our sin. Repentance means we are sorry about our sin to the point of grief, and we have turned and walked away from it.
Repenting of something doesn’t necessarily mean we will never commit that sin again. It means we don’t intend to ever commit it again. So if you find that you have to confess the same sin again after you have only recently confessed and repented of it, then do it. Don’t let the enemy throw guilt at you and try to convince you that God will stop accepting your confession. This is a big, fat lie from the Liar of Liars—Satan. Confess and repent as many times as necessary to throw him off and see God’s redeeming love help you win the battle over this problem. Remember, God forgives every time you confess sin before Him and fully repent of it. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9
We want to repeat that regardless of the sin that you need to confess, God will forgive you. His very nature is loving, merciful, forgiving and kind. He wants you to call on Him for every need in your life. There is no sin too big or ugly that He cannot or will not forgive if our hearts are open to Him.
If you don’t know how to pray, here’s an example of a prayer for forgiveness.
Lord, I come humbly before You and ask You to cleanse my heart of every fault and renew a right spirit within me. Forgive me for thoughts I have had, words I have spoken and things that I have done that are not glorifying to You or are indirect contradiction to Your commands. Specifically, I confess to You (name any burden/sin that you know is not pleasing to God). I confess it as sin and I repent of it. Make me clean and right before you. AMEN